COVID and the Cauliflower fondler

I sometimes do my groceries at the local «bio » store. The clientèle there is particularly colorful and seems to react to the COVID19 pandemic with post apocalyptic hysterical panic or complete denial. The other day, I was waiting like an idiot, as usual for the vegetable aisle clear out so I could respect social distancing (a concern which my co-shoppers did not seem to share), I was delayed by a rather peculiar man. He was wearing the usual rich marais hippy attire: sandals, worn out combat pants and a vomit colored misshapen natural fibre t shirt. He was picking out a cauliflower and in doing so he was clearly intent on harming the biggest number of people possible. It seemed that buying the perfect cauliflower was the single most important decision of this person’s life. He was picking up every single one, inspecting it, fondling them tenderly and putting them back. I was truly at a loss. How important could it be to get a perfect cauliflower during a pandemic for this person to risk contaminating everyone? I wanted to say something but decided instead to tell the staff “il y a un monsieur qui tripote les chou fleurs”. I need to be more direct the next time someone tries to turn a cauliflower into a biological weapon.